Gift ideas for bored or hurried shoppers

0

Why sure, we all have wasted a dollar or two on something stupid we thought we might need or buy for a loved one. Here is a list of really neat gifts, pocket candy and other suitable ideas to impress your friends.

• Fried Chicken Candy: Available all day on Sunday for that quick fried fix. Pop one in your mouth and enjoy the crunch and greasy flavor.

• I’m Too Sexy For These Socks: Great for party wear. The socks come with the beautiful embroidered lyrics to the hit song. Be sure to wear short pants so the girls can read your socks.

• Hu Oh Emergency Underpants: Who hasn’t needed a pair of these during crisis situations during illness on trips or office meetings. They are particularly handy during a Norovirus outbreak on a cruise.

• Nose Flute: Be the hit of your next party while playing a tune on the specially built Nose Flute in the key of G. Make sure your allergies are under control and that nasty cold is gone.

• Wasabi Poppy Candy: Impress your friends with a tangy new taste they will remember you for sharing.

• Shut The Heck Up Gum: Pass around pieces of this tasteful delight during political debates with your friends so you will have a lasting opinion they will remember. Made with ultra-sticky sap from the South American Ramon’ tree.

• Memory Mints for Seniors: For seniors who have moments of memory loss about something but I can’t remember what it is.

• Vladimir Pootin’ Lavatory Mist: A must have for everyone’s bathroom.

• F on Exams Daily Calendar: A great way for the underachiever to keep track of the number of days left in the college semester before he is asked to leave.

• Instant Irish Accent Gum: Impress your friends with this ale-tasting gum that immediately gives you a pub infused Irish accent.

• Tattoupees For Bald Guys: Never again worry about buying, fitting or getting the right color toupee for an evening out. Make it a permanent fix with stylish needle brush strokes that will keep you looking young for years.

• Atone Mints: Fast acting mints quickly popped in your mouth that reverse the stupid rude remarks you made to your girl, wife or group of people. They are handy to have while speaking in public. Also works with stupid twitter messages when rubbed on your typing fingers.

• No Tear Toilet Paper: Forget the cheap hotel wipes when you can carry the no-tear on vacation or business trips. Made out of ground up pinewood shavings. Every home should have a roll.

• Champagne Jelly Mints: A wonderful and handy candy for those special occasions. They come in different flavors and bubble levels.

• Ginsburg’s Judgmints: Great for family arguments at Thanksgiving. Eat one mint and you will be able to discuss every side of the argument and make a final decree before dessert.

Share.

About Author

Comments are closed.