For men only…. “Hey guys, we aren’t too bad off!”

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dad-bod

By Bill Derby

I don’t read too much news online since it might not be true but an item caught my eye yesterday morning I hope is true.

Women prefer men’s bodies with a little more excess around the middle, ‘love handles’ they called it in my day.  Today it’s called ‘the dad bod’ which has been floating around on Al Gore’s internet for a couple of years.

Officially, a male physique with up to 20 extra pounds of sleep muscle on his body qualifies as a person with a ‘dad bod’.  In a recent survey published in Women’s Health, Planet Fitness did the survey showing the most attractive body type is ‘the dad bod’ and not the dude with the six pack abs.

We have all done it or most have at the local swimming hole or while taking an exercise walk down our favorite beach. Each time we pass a bevy of good looking bikini-clad gals we do the belly suck.

It’s been mastered by millions of bathing suit wearing men by pulling in the stomach with what’s left of your back muscles thus lifting your pecks as high as possible giving the appearance of an Arnold  Terminator or Charles Atlas chest.  This technique can only last less than a minute before your face turns purple from lack of oxygen although the stomach suck exercise could be considered a healthy isometric technique. Beach walking is also considered exercise while carrying a heavy beer-filled Yeti cup. Now with the ‘dad bod’ officially recognized as a ‘qualifying hunk’, stomach sucking is a thing of the past.

The article went on to say, “The majority of people think positively about dad bods, and men who identify as having them are proud of who they are.”  It also shows these men have the ability to select the finest in dining and quality foods to consume.  The women in this survey, 78% of them, “believe that guys with dad bods are most comfortable and confident in their own skin. And there’s really nothing more attractive than that.”

Woo…who, dang, that’s good news. But, there are limitations, while some of us have gone to seed the accompanying graph will show you exactly where your bag of bones rates in the weight ‘dad bod’ category. Take a look and see where you flab fits.

If your man has six-pack abs don’t go kicking him out of the house. Buy a couple of extra pizzas and a case of cold ones to get him on the right track to attractiveness. The article/survey states, “The dad bod is a nice balance between a beer gut and working out. The dad bod guy says, ‘I go to the gym occasionally, but I also drink heavily on the weekends and enjoy eating eight slices of pizza at a time.’”

Get him to that point honey and you’ve got yourself a man who is comfortable in his skin although stretched slightly from whence he stopped working on his abs. Remember, “Seven out of ten women are more attracted to the ‘dad bod’ than a dude who has washboard abs.”

The Planet Fitness survey suggested… “The dad bods is the ‘new six-pack.’ They suggested instead of working out an extra 30 minutes at the gym, buy yourself a six-pack to celebrate your dad bod instead.”

A few years back when the Twinkie company closed down there was a definite shortage of blooming ‘dad bod’ men to the dismay of chunky-loving gals but the new company has revived and is again helping with the shortage.
A few years ago the total qualifying ‘dad bod’ census gave us about 27.9 million men which would be larger than men in Texas.  Texans don’t have a ‘dad bod’ problem since consuming copious amounts of brisket, beer, sausages and tamales.

I will make sure Judy reads this and realizes how fortunate she is living with a ‘dad bod’ who just narrowly qualified as such.

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