By Bill Derby, Publisher
Ladies, if you have already bought one of these gifts you might want to consider an exchange. There is still time. I found a list of Christmas gift ‘no, no’s’ for men.
During the Christmas season, gift buying for men is an art. Below is a list of what not to purchase for your husband or boyfriend for Christmas. Remember, there is still time to exchange.
Fancy shaving kits
They are expensive. A cheap disposable razor will do the same job just as well. Replacement blades will cost him and are a pain to keep in stock and dangerous to install.
It’s inbred in women. They love to try and change who men are. I don’t believe I have ever seen a Victoria’s Secret for men. Maybe there is a bloomers store for guys called ‘Bobby Knows’ somewhere. If you really have to buy underwear, get the heavy duty style which offers more than a couple of days wear.
Not really a bad choice if you know what he prefers but get his approval first. Smelling like a make-up counter at Belk is not his choice. A woodsy, musky, mossy smell might be more appropriate.
Coupons for favors
Unless it’s a coupon airline ticket to Aruba for two, forget the coupons. Examples are: “Good for one free back massage, any time.” “Romantic dinner for two.” “Understanding hug with no questions asked!”
Men rarely read this drivel such as, “Treasury of Classic Love Poems.” “What Your Dreams Are Telling You.” “The Secret Language of Birthdays.” What he considers girl books, aren’t.
Scent-centric devices, ornaments and accoutrements
I had an accoutrement once when the Army invited me to Ft. Benning, GA. for six weeks. The only scent men are interested in might be during deer hunting season when they use female deer urine to attract male deer. Men don’t really care what stuff smells like unless it’s food.
Why would a man want to cypher a message on anything unless it was a request for a prescription from his doctor or to please call the police? Emails work just fine and they don’t require licking a stamp.
A Thighmaster – I can’t conceive of anyone buying a thighmaster for a man unless his woman knows he’ll never use it and it will be available
for her the day after Christmas.
Well, these gifts are hints at doing more chores around the house. Unless it has a big motor, wheels and a gas tank, don’t buy tools that fit in the hand or require arm movement.
I’ve received artwork presents before. “Honey, it’s for both of us to enjoy. Might even consider it an investment.” Unless there is an absolute chance it will increase in value, don’t buy.
Products that need assembling
These type gifts closely mirror work tools. Unless it comes in a big crate with Harley Davidson written on it, don’t buy stuff that has to be assembled.
Ties and socks
These gift ideas just barely made the list since they are an easy purchase. President Biden doesn’t wear ties to every function. Save the purchase for a more special occasion like the next volcano eruption in Virginia.