Compiled by Bill Derby
In June many people get married. Judy and I tied the knot on June 12 over 480 years ago. She would probably consider that time has gone by very quickly. I found these thoughts about marriage. They may or may not apply.
Thoughts on Marriage……
•A married man is a caged bird. – Spanish Proverb
• Always say no, and you will never be married. – French Proverb
• Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. – Phyllis Diller
•Love is blind, but marriage restores its sight. – Georg C. Lichtenberg
• She tells enough white lies to ice a wedding cake. – Margot Asquith
•Even pearls are dark before the whiteness of his teeth. – William R. Alger
• The proper basis for marriage is mutual misunderstanding. – Oscar Wilde
• In Hollywood, a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk. – Rita Rudner
• Now a soft kiss; Aye, by that kiss, I vow an endless bliss. – John Keats
• Bride: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her. – Ambrose Bierce
• I should have suspected my husband was lazy. On our wedding day, his mother told me: “I’m not losing a son; I’m gaining a couch.” – Phyllis Diller
• Marriage: A word which should be pronounced “mirage.” – Herbert Spencer
• A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband. – Ogden Nash
• It is after you have lost your teeth that you can afford to buy steaks. – Pierre Renoir
• The last thing my kids ever did to earn money was lose their baby teeth. – Phyllis Diller
•Marriage is a lottery, but you can’t tear up your ticket if you lose. – F.M. Knowles
• Marriage halves our griefs, doubles our joys, and quadruples our expenses. – G K Chesterton
• Marriage is very difficult. It’s like a 5,000-piece jigsaw puzzle, all sky. – Cathy Ladman
• In marriage, being the right person is as important as finding the right person. – Wilbert Donald Gough
•A journey is like marriage. The certain way to be wrong is to think you control it. – John Steinbeck
• Marriage is one of the few institutions that allow a man to do as his wife pleases. – Milton Berle
• A long marriage is two people trying to dance a duet and two solos at the same time. – Anne Taylor Fleming
• Marriage is a wonderful institution… if, of course, you like living in an institution. – Groucho Marx
• If I get married again, I want a guy there with a drum to do rim shots during the vows. – Sam Kinison
• I came from a big family. As a matter of fact, I never got to sleep alone until I was married. – Lewis Grizzard
• The one charm of marriage is that it makes a life of deception absolutely necessary for both parties. – Oscar Wilde
• Wit is the sudden marriage of ideas which before their union were not perceived to have any relation. – Mark Twain
•You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you. – Walt Disney
•There’s a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It’s called marriage. – Sam Kinison
• After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can’t face each other, but still they stay together. – Sacha Guitry
•Getting married is easy. Staying married is more difficult. Staying happily married for a lifetime should rank among the fine arts. – Roberta Flack
