Marriage Wisdom 2020

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Our annual wedding guide is presented in this edition. I thought it important to include the following statements gathered over the years for youngsters thinking of marriage.

Marriage is a wonderful thing. It’s a partnership of hearts but must always, always include a level of humor with both partners sharing laughter. As they say…a good many women are good tempered simply because it saves the wrinkles coming too soon. Also, a husband is what is left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.

Marriage Wisdom

• A good wife always forgives her husband when she’s wrong.

• A lady inserted an ‘ad’ in the classifieds: “Husband wanted”. Next day she received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: “You can have mine.”

• A little boy asked his father, “Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?” And the father replied, “I don’t know son, I’m still paying.”

• A man said his credit card was stolen but he decided not to report it since the thief was spending much less than his wife did.

• A man upon his engagement, went to his father and said, “Dad! I’ve found a woman just like mother” His father replied, “So what do you want? Sympathy?”

• A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

• A woman is incomplete until she is married. Then she is finished.

• After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, “You know, I was a fool when I married you.” The husband replied, “Yes dear, but I was in love and didn’t notice.”

• How do most men define marriage? An expensive way to get your laundry done free.

• I bought my wife a new car. She called and said, “There was water in the carburetor.” I asked her, “Where’s the car?” She replied, “In the lake.”

• I haven’t spoken to my wife in 18 months – I don’t like to interrupt her.

• I married Miss Right. I just didn’t know her first name was Always.

• I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.

• It’s not true that married men live longer than single men. It only seems longer.

• Just think, if it weren’t for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.

• Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage. They’ve experienced pain and bought jewelry.

• My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.

• My wife dresses to kill. She also cooks the same way.

• The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.

• Then there was a woman who said, “I never knew what real happiness was until I got married; and by then it was too late.”

• Young son: “Is it true Dad,that in some parts of Africa a man doesn’t know his wife until he marries her?” Dad: “That happens in every country, son.”

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